FOR ALL AGES
Animal puns are always a favourite, and this list of 40 llama jokes will have you rolling on the floor laughing.
Llamas are undeniably funny, with their thick woolly coats, sparky attitudes and habit of spitting when cross. Llamas are part of a larger family of animals called Camelidae, which also includes alpacas as well as their wild cousins, vicuña and guanaco.
In their native Peru, llamas' fiery personalities and hatred of dogs has led to them being used to guard flocks of sheep and alpacas.
What's the difference between an alpaca and a llama? No, this isn't the first pun of the list, we're really asking. Although they're easy to confuse, llamas are taller, with longer faces and bigger ears, while alpacas are shorter with thick, shaggy wool. The babies of both are called crias. Llamas are usually used to carry heavy loads through the Peruvian mountains, while alpacas provide soft, fluffy wool for clothing.
Well, after all those facts we feel thoroughly i-llamanated, so let's move on to the jokes.
These llama puns will get you cria-ing with laughter.
What happens when you get stuck between two llamas? You get llamanated.
What do you call a fast llama? A llamaghini.
How do llamas think the world will end? Llamageddon.
Why should you never buy anything from llamas? They’ll fleece you.
Why did the llama win the rap battle? Because he was good at spitting.
What should you say to a group of llamas before you tell them a llama joke? Stop me if you’ve herd this one.
What's a llama's favourite pudding? A banana spit.
Where do llamas go for a nice holiday? Shangri-llama.
How do other animals ask a llama's name? Como te llama?
Oldies but goodies with a llama twist, these classics will get a giggle for sure.
Why did the llama cross the road? It was the chicken's day off.
Which side of a llama has the most fleece? The outside.
Why do llamas have such long necks? To make sure their heads stay on.
What do you call a llama with his head underwater? Anything you want, he can’t hear you.
What do you call two llamas standing next to a bell? Llama llama ding dong.
Featuring Llama del Rey, Kendrick Llama and more, each llama pun in this section includes at least one famous face.
Why did the pope invite an animal into the Vatican? Because it was the Dalai Llama.
What do you call the president of Llamaland? Barack Ollama.
Who's the best llama rapper? Kendrick Llama.
Who’s a llama’s favourite singer? Llama del Rey.
We know they're really a different animal, but we'd say alpacas are still close enough to llamas to make you spit with laughter.
What do you call a herd of alpacas stampeding? The alpaca-lypse.
Why did the llama turn the music off at karaoke night? She wanted to sing alpacapella.
Did you hear about the alpaca who started an advice column? She was good at solving dillamas.
Why didn’t the alpaca want coffee? He only drinks llamanade.
What did the alpaca say when her friend asked how far the beach was? It’s spitting distance.
You'll really need to be able to tell your llamas from your vicuñas to get some of these advanced llama jokes.
What do you call two baby llamas standing on a compass? North Cria and South Cria
How do vicuñas wake up in the morning? They use allama clocks.
Where do baby llamas go to eat? The pizzacria
What did the vicuña say when the alpaca asked to borrow her phone? No probllama.
Did you hear about the llama who couldn't see? Someone pulled the wool over her eyes.
Did you hear about the alpaca who tried to fly to the moon? What? No, llama say is that’s crazy.
Did you hear about the llama who wrote a book? He was a woolly thinker.
Did you hear about the llama who wouldn’t go outside because her hair was messy? She’s such a llama queen!
Did you hear about the scientist llama who missed out on the Nobel Prize? She had a new theory, but she couldn’t Peru-ve it.
What do you call a llama joke with a sequel? Llama drama, of course! If you like one llama joke, you'll love a two-part one.
What did the llama say when she was invited to the picnic? Alpaca sandwich.
Why was the alpaca freaked out? He thought the llama wanted to eat him.
What happened when Llaura Llama got in a fight with her twin sister? Llama drama!
What did their mum say about it? They looked like the spitting image of each other.
What did the llama say when the vicuña asked why he knew so many jokes? Llama funny guy.
What did the vicuña say back? Wool have to see about that.
Who doesn't like a good knock knock joke?
Knock knock
Who’s there
Per
Per who?
Yes, that is where llamas come from.
Knock knock
Who's there?
Alpaca.
Alpaca who?
Alpaca bag for you, we're going on holiday.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Llama say.
Llama say who?
Wait, a talking llama?
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