jack donaghy

“ Then you take that problem and you crush it with your mind vice. But for lesser beings, like curly haired men and people who need glasses, therapy can help. ”

“ There are no bad ideas. Only good ideas that go horribly wrong. ”

“ But I don't care, because I thrive in crisis mode. It is when I am really at my best. ”

“ l fake a hurricane and all regularly scheduled programming is preempted. ”

“ Those shoes are definitely bi-curious. ”

“ No, Tracy took advantage of my white guilt, which is supposed to be used only for good, like over-tipping and supporting Barack Obama. ”

“ I believe that when you have a problem, you talk it over with your priest, or your tailor, or the mute elevator porter at your men's club. ”

“ Liz Lemon: Hey Jack, do you treat me any differently because I'm a woman? ”

“ Never go with a hippie to a second location. ”

“ Now that's the spirit. But if they're not taking resignations, there's only one way out: we have to work together to get fired. ”