FOR ALL AGES
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Accordion to a recent survey, most people don't even notice when you replace regular words with random musical instruments.
Read that first line again slowly! Whether you're an aspiring musician, a rock music lover, a regular at the music store or even a music teacher, jokes about music will never hit a bum note. No matter if you're looking for classical music jokes or music puns, or anything in between, we've carefully curated a list of marvellous music jokes that has something for everyone.
From corny music jokes to side-splittingly hilarious, there's so much to laugh at, no matter what your sense of humour is like. Find out what you get when you drop a piano down a mineshaft, learn how many conductors it takes to change a light bulb and discover how you fix a broken brass instrument. And while we're at it, why did the piano player keep banging his head on the keys? Find out the hilarious answers to these music jokes and so many more.
If you love our kids' music jokes, then maybe you'll also enjoy our collection of the 50 best jokes for kids around. Or, get stuck into one of our many great online music activities to do this summer with the kids. Whatever you do, do it after you’ve finished laughing your socks off at this list of hilarious music jokes!
These funny music jokes get everybody laughing. Which is your favourite music joke?
1) What type of music are balloons afraid of? Pop music!
2) Where did the music teacher leave his keys? In the piano!
3) What's the difference between a fish and a piano? You can't tuna fish!
4) What did the robbers take from the music store? The lute!
5) What sort of music do frogs like? Hip Hop!
6) Why couldn't the athlete listen to his music? Because he broke the record!
7) What part of a snake is the most musical? The scales!
8) What's an avocado's favourite kind of music? Guac and roll!
9) What do you get if Bach falls off his horse but has the courage to get back on and keep riding? Bach in the saddle!
10) Why is a piano so hard to open? Because the keys are already inside!
11) What's an ancient Egyptian mummy's favourite kind of music? Rap!
12) Why couldn't the string quartet find their composer? He was Haydn!
13) Why don't skeletons play music in church? Because they don't have any organs!
14) What's the most musical type of food? Chicken drumsticks!
15) Why did the tortilla chip start dancing? Because they put on the salsa!
16) Why was the musician arrested? Because she got in treble!
17) What genre of music is the national anthem? Country music!
18) What's a golfer's favourite type of music? Swing!
19) How do you make a bandstand? Take away their chairs!
20) How do you fix a broken brass instrument? With a tuba glue!
21) What has forty feet and sings? The school choir!
22) What's a pirate's favourite instrument? The guit-arrr!
23) Which one of Santa's helpers was the best singer? Elf-is Presley!
24) Why did the pianist keep banging his head against the keys? He was playing by ear!
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25) What do a sword and a piano have in common? They can both B sharp!
26) Why did the opera singer bring a ladder to the concert? Because she wanted to reach the high notes!
27) What music does a planet listen to? Nep-tunes!
28) What's a skeleton's favourite instrument? The trombone!
29) What rock band has four members who don't sing or play any instruments? Mount Rushmore.
30) What key does a cow sing in? Beef flat!
31) What do you get when you put a radio in the fridge? Cool music!
32) Why does Jay-Z love Christmas so much? Because of all the wrapping!
33) What do you call a musical insect? A humbug!
34) How do you make Lady Gaga mad? Poker face!
35) What kind of instrument do rats play? Mouse organs!
36) What's Beethoven's favourite fruit? Ba-na-na-NAAA!
37) Why do bagpipe players walk when they play? To get away from the noise!
38) What song do vampires hate? 'You Are My Sunshine'!
39) What's the difference between a guitar and a fish? You can't tuna fish!
40) Why are pirates such good singers? They can hit the high Cs!
41) What do a harmonica and a lawsuit have in common? Everyone is relieved when the case is closed!
42) What's a cat's favourite subject at school? Mew-sic!
43) What makes music in your hair? A headband!
44) How many conductors does it take to change a light bulb? Only one, but it takes four movements!
45) What's the difference between a viola and onions? Nobody cries when you chop up a viola!
46) What sort of music does a mountain like? Rock!
47) What's the best Christmas present in the whole world? A broken drum; you can't beat it!
48) What do you call a cow that can play a musical instrument? A moo-sician!
49) What do you get when you drop a piano down a mine? A flat minor!
50) Why did Beethoven get annoyed at his chickens? They kept saying "Bach, Bach, Bach"!
Get Bach to basics with these hilarious musical jokes.
51) I keep hearing music coming from my printer. I think the paper is jamming!
52) There are so many jokes about classical composers. I could write you a whole Liszt!
53) I heard you lost your classical music CD. But don't worry, I've got your Bach!
54) My friends and I are in a band called 'Duvet'. We're a covers band!
55) I don't think wind turbines like classical music. They're big metal fans, though!
56) I'd never hit someone with a musical instrument. I don't like to have to resort to violins!
57) Arnold Schwarzenegger is starring in a movie about classical music composers. He'll be Bach!
58) My friend says he's going to start learning bass guitar... something about this sounds fishy.
59) A musician told me he was going to hit me with the neck of his guitar. I replied, "Is that a fret?"
60) The pop music industry is very eco-friendly; they keep recycling the same four chords!
61) My neighbours listen to great music - whether they like it or not!
Image © Unsplash
Take a look at our hilarious music jokes based on funny stories.
62) Rick Astley will let you borrow any movie from his Pixar collection except one. He's never going to give you Up.
63) Marine biologists have discovered a group of killer whales that keep on meeting up and playing music together. They called it an orca-stra!
64) When Mozart died, a very strange thing happened. People who would go to his grave swore they could hear his music, but it was playing backwards. After a long time, they finally figured out what was going on. He was decomposing.
65) A music teacher accidentally left his classroom window open during a storm. Luckily the damage seemed to B minor.
66) Some friends and I are in a band called '999 Megabytes'. We haven't got a gig yet.
These music jokes will knock your socks off!
67) Knock knock!
Who's there?
Little old lady.
Little old lady who?
I didn't know you could yodel!
68) Knock knock!
Who's there?
Benjamin.
Benjamin who?
I've Benjamin to the music!
69) Knock knock!
Who's there?
Britney Spears.
Britney Spears who?
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Oops! I did it again!
70) Knock, knock!
Who's there?
Turnip.
Turnip who?
Turnip the volume, this is my all-time favorite song!
71) Knock knock!
Who's there?
Elvis.
Elvis who?
Elvis has left the building!
72) Knock, knock!
Who's there?
Freeze.
Freeze who?
Freeze a jolly good fellow!
73) Knock, knock!
Who's there?
Sing.
Sing who?
Whoooooooo!
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