FOR ALL AGES
Hit all the right notes with these best musician and best music jokes!
Here are some of the best musical jokes for you to satisfy your musician humor. Jokes ranging from flat jokes to great puns about music.
Research has shown that synchronizing music with repetitive exercise enhances physical performance, helps work out longer, and provides more efficient training! It also provides enhanced physical performance, assisting people to both work out for longer and train more efficiently. Musician Rod Stewart holds the Guinness World Record for most attended free concerts in history with an estimated attendance of 4.2 million people in 1993 at his New Year's Eve concert in Copacabana Beach in Rio de Janeiro, Brazil. In a fantastic feat, Chris Hadfield, a Canadian astronaut, released his first album, that he recorded in orbit! Chris spent 144 days on the International Space Station where he recorded 11 original songs for his album "Space Sessions: Songs for a Tin Can."
With all that out of the way, let's shuffle through some funny orchestra jokes, musical puns, trumpet puns, violin puns, orchestra puns, pianist puns, music theory jokes, choir puns, marching band jokes, percussionist jokes, and some great trombonist jokes!
For more related jokes, take a look at guitar jokes and viola jokes.
Pianist jokes? Accordion jokes? Trombone puns? Cello jokes? Bassist jokes? Clarinet jokes? You name it, we have it!
1. Why was the child unable to find the key to the piano? Because all the keys are inside!
2. What does a chicken use to play drums in a band? Drumsticks.
3. What was the skeleton’s favorite instrument? Trombone.
4. Which instrument did the rat learn to play? Mouse Organ.
5. Why did the musician rob an instrument store? Because he wanted an excellent lute.
6. What kind of band doesn’t play music? A rubber band.
7. Why do bagpipers walk while playing? To get away from the noise.
8. Why was the child not allowed to watch symphonies on TV? Because of all the violins!
9. Why did the child decide to learn guitar? Because it struck a chord with him.
10. What happened to the Honda Accord that was rear-ended by a truck? It turned into a Honda Accordion.
11. How many clarinet players does it take to change a light bulb? Only one, but they'll keep looking in the box till they find the perfect one.
12. What do you do with a rhythm-less drummer? Take away one of the sticks and make him a conductor.
13. What happened to the piano that fell down a mine shaft? It turned into a flat miner!
Bach to Bach sections of great jokes? Who's going to say no?! Shuffle through some of them here.
14. Which classical music composer likes tea the most? Chai-kovsky.
15. Why did Mozart find chicken annoying? Because they kept going, “Bach, bach, bach!”
16. What did the pianist take with him to the supermarket? Chopin Liszt.
17. What did the classical music performing Boy Band name themselves? The Bach Street Boys.
18. What do you call a microorganism which only listens to classical music? A Bach-teria.
19. Why was the composer busy? Because he had several scores to settle!
20. Why was Mozart the top dog? Because he was in a Wolfgang!
21. Classical jokes are easy to come up with. I could write you a long Liszt.
22. I used to only listen to classical music. But now I think outside the Bach.
23. Why was the father of the symphony hard to find? Because he kept Haydn.
24. Why did Tchaikovsky visit the asylum? Because he wanted to prove Nutcracker wasn’t a fluke.
25. Why couldn't anybody find the composer of Carmen for an interview? Because he was Bizet.
Who doesn't want more jokes about musicians?! We certainly do, and hope so do you!
26. Why were the musician's friends tired of him? Because he kept composing plans to meet but never acted upon them!
27. Why did the police arrest the musician? Because he got in treble!
28. Why did the musician become a pirate? Because he wanted to hit the high Cs.
29. Why did the musician want to have a chat with his rival? Because he had a trom-bone to pick!
30. Why was the musician depressed? Because he was a trebled man.
31. How many rock musicians does it take to change a light bulb? Two. One to screw in the new one and one to smash the old one on the other’s head.
32. Why was the musician not getting out of his bed? Because he was feeling the blues.
33. What do you call a musician petrified by Medusa? A Rockstar.
34. Why are musicians bad at fishing? Because they keep dropping the bass.
35. Why was the musician reluctant to release lossless music? Because he was afraid of getting flac for it.
36. Where do classical musicians release their songs? YouTuba.
37. Who was the stingray's favorite musician? Billy Ray Cyrus.
38. Why were the musicians recycling their trash? Because it was Green Day.
39. Why don’t musicians wear headbands? Because their hair starts making music!
40. How many musicians would it take to change a light bulb? Only one if it wasn't for their impotence!
41. What do you call a gingerbread man with one leg? Limp Bizkit.
42. Why couldn’t Zelda find her prince charming? Because Linkin Park.
43. Why did Snoop Dog carry an umbrella? Fo’ Drizzle.
44. What does Taylor Swift do when she’s having a bad day? She shakes it off.
45. How many pilots do you need to make good music? 22.
46. Why did the Vampire not drink Taylor Swift’s blood? Because she had bad blood.
47. What’s the definition of a saint? A person who owns an accordion but won’t play it.
Here are some of our best musician one-liners!
48. I was gonna tell a joke, but it was too korn-y for my taste.
49. ABBA broke up and focused on their magician career. They named themselves ABBA-Cadabra.
50. A popular band were providing free flu shots to their fans. They were the Flu Fighters.
51. The posh lady only listened to only one band. Pearl Jam.
52. My son tried to pawn off my album collection. He’s such a Daft Punk.
53. Def Leppard wasn’t sure if their fans would appreciate their new songs. Their fear turned them into Dread Leppard.
54. The Music Festival's excitement came to a halt as soon as The Police appeared on the stage.
55. The band’s performance was so bad they decided to give the fans a refund. Every Nickleback.
56. Enthusiasm came back to the band as they kept performing. Their improvement smells like team spirit.
57. Benjamin’s friends kept playing songs that reminded him of his ex. His friends were Breaking Benjamin.
58.There was a band of musicians who were experts in knock-knock jokes. This was because they called themselves The Doors!
59. McDonald's opened a new outlet in the town of Fleetwood. Their special was the Fleetwood Mac.
60. The Zeppelin was covered in light to help people see them at night. It was a LED Zeppelin.
61. My relationship with a girlfriend, who was a chemistry teacher, came to a close abruptly. My Chemical Romance came to an end.
62. The monk finally found who his favorite band was. He realized it when he achieved Nirvana.
63. Songs about monsters are hard to come by unless it’s from The Beastie Boys.
64. Lewis Caroll left out some dark parts of his story. Alice in Chains was omitted.
65. Monkeys can survive in any condition. Just look at Arctic Monkeys.
66. Awareness against smoking was raised, but nobody bought it because The Chainsmokers were at the helm.
67. The man was happy in death; he had been Avenged Sevenfold.
Some randomly good music jokes for kids alongside some music one-liners and jokes about singers!
68. Why did a Dell laptop drown itself? Because it was a fan of rolling in the deep.
69. What is a mummy’s favorite music? W-rap.
70. Why did the balloon get scared when he heard the music play? Because it was pop music.
71. What was the bunny’s favorite music? Hip Hop.
72. Why couldn’t the athlete listen to music? Because he broke the records.
73. Why was music coming out of the printer? Because it was jamming.
74. What did Jay-Z call his wife before getting married to her? Feyonce.
75. Why did the cow start taking singing lessons? Because she wanted to be a moo-sician.
76. What band do Jehovah's Witness’ love? The Doors.
77. Why was the Boy Band stuck in one spot? Because they kept going in One Direction.
78. Why does a hummingbird only hum? Because it keeps forgetting the words.
79. What did the metal fan tell his barber with shaky hands? Slipknot, or you’ll cut me!
80. Why did the drummer get embarrassed at the live show? Because Motley didn’t cue him when to stop!
81. What was the rapper bunny’s stage name? Thugs Bunny.
82. Why were the band members arrested? Because they started a massive jam on the highway!
83. Why are DJs considered down to earth? Because they started from scratch.
84. What do you get when you drop a piano in a warzone? A flat major.
85. Why did the metal band perform in front of windmills? Because windmills are huge metal fans!
86. Where do whales go to see live band performances? To the Orca-stra.
87. What streaming service does a pirate use to listen to music? Eye-Tunes.
88. Who makes music in Mordor? The Orc-hestra.
89. What is a stone’s favorite music genre? Rock.
90. What was the bug’s favorite band? The Beatles.
91. What happened when A, B and D went to a rock concert, but B was the only one disappointed? Because A see, D see, but B couldn’t.
92. Why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the country singer.
93. What did the Chinese ripoff of the band Iron Maiden call themselves? Maiden China.
94. Why are bassists cowards? Because they disappear at the first sign of treble.
95. How many bassists does it take to change a lightbulb? None. The keyboard player can do it with one hand.
96. Why was the violinist braver than the bassist? Because it never fret.
97. How many trombonists does it take to fix a broken lightbulb? One to change it, four to tune it.
Here at Kidadl, we have carefully created lots of great family-friendly jokes for everyone to enjoy! If you liked our suggestions for Musician Jokes And Puns, then why not take a look at music jokes, band jokes or drummer jokes.
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