squidward

“ Welcome to the Krusty Krab, where it's almost as if the evolutionary clock ticks backwards. ”

“ Beautiful and talented. what more do they want? Don't worry folks, there's more where that came from. ”

“ It all started when I was born. ”

“ Im a winner, see my prize! Youre a loser who sits and cries. ”

“ I order the food, you cook the food, the customer gets the food. We do that for forty years and then we die. ”

“ Public life ain't all it's cracked up to be. ”

“ Welcome to the House of Misery. May I take your order? ”

“ Please come again... when I'm not working ”

“ Is it time already for you to ruin my day? ”

“ What are those Neanderthals doing? Can't they see I'm spoiling myself? ”